Friday, October 25, 2013

Thordar, son of Ilkrik, the Viceroy's invisible hand

TA 2971 ( 63 years ago )

Thordar was the first born of Ilkrik "StoutHearth". Thordar was born in a long lineage of Kings' butlers. He grew in the muffled comfort of Dain II Ironfoot's personal quarters in Erebor.  At this time, Dain was going through a rough patch, and was drinking heavily. His brother, Bain StoneTongue was keeping a close eye on the sovereign to preserve the King's dark secret. Since Thordar could easily walk through the King's personal quarters, Bain took upon himself to train the child as a first line observer. Thordar grew fond of the King and his brother. Most notably, his quick thinking saved Dain II from death after a day of excessive drinking.

TA 2989 ( Age 19 )

In the first year of Balin's Moria expedition, the security around Dain II was bolstered drastically. His life was in danger from within (so they thought). Thordar was now an apprentice to his father and still a fixture in the King's personal quarters. He had by then managed to recruit a number of his peers around the castle to maintain a network of inconspicuous eyes. When Bain got "pushed out" to Dale as an ambassador, Thordar left his father and followed to the great city of men.

TA 3019 ( Age 49 )

A year short of being married, Thordar's life fell apart. During the siege and subsequent sacking of Dale, he volunteered to remain behind to fight a rear-guard action. This heroic act allowed the members of the royal family (Such as Bain, Gror and Goldo) to escape a certain death to the hands of the Easterlings.  Thordar was captured by Mirkwood orcs and Easterlings, and carried with the advancing armies as food store. Thus ensued the longest 30 days of his life: He was kept in a constant state of fear by the orcs.  You see, orcs believe that meat taste better if exhausted and under stress. On the eve of the last assault on the keep, a group of Easterlings used Thordar for a bizarre ritual where he was castrated and his testicules eaten. Thordar escaped for his life by jumping into a well.  He remained there for the last fews days of the occupation. When the dwarves recaptured Dale, he was both a eunuch and a war hero. A combination with no precedents in dwarven history.

Pedantic dwarves claimed that the butler of Kings could not be a eunuch. The case blew out of proportion, which was moot because Thordar was really working for Bain, the brother of the King and heir apparent.  He kept a low profile as the reign of Thorin III began. His father died defending Dain II Ironfoot's body in the field of battle (yes, dwarven butlers do that).

Thordar took an interest in exotic combat techniques. He began researching Eastern and Elvish fighting styles. His interest honed on the use of a smallsword to parry and perform precise and deadly strikes. He accumulated a small library of references, designed a weapon and had it made by one of the best weaponsmith in Erebor.  Meanwhile, he maintained a front as Bain's butler while organizing a sophisticated network of spies keeping tabs on Erebor's high society.

Thordar engaged increasingly in jobs. He became fast, silent and deadly. Although emotionally stable, he developed a macho demeanor which drifted into an insatiable bloodlust for his legit targets. His beard thinned out, so he had one made: particularly thick and bushy. Dwarves find him a little too much (hence the OPH). He took great pride in vindictive defeats of male opponents using a fast, furious and merciless style of his own.   He is not a psychopath, nor a criminal, but he will not let go of his opponent once he gets started. His joy in life if to slay orcs because they are not people: they don't have feelings and have no rights according to dwarven laws.

Thordar kept the halls of Erebor clean where the Mystic guard would fail. No other dwarves ever fought with the same panache and swiftness. Some folk say that he grew back his testicules. No one has, of yet, asked him if this is true.

Since the start of the Campaign

Thordar got the notice from Bain to prepare to leave for Khazad-dum. He managed to place many of his associates at various levels of the Emerald-Unit. He lifted a lot of dirt on Drolf, the Attack-Lord of Ardacer. The dwarf is a monster, undwarven-like: a liability. Thordar has not yet shared his concern with the Viceroy. He sees this as a golden opportunity to prove once more his worth.


  1. Another youngster. Khazek likes it! Finally someone who just might 'get it!'

    1. You guys can live your teenage angst together. Will anyone ever understand how you really feel?